NO TURNING BACK (#3)

At three a.m. when my water broke, I was caught by surprise(who isn’t).

After I realized that I didn’t wet the bed, I woke my boyfriend who found it hysterical that I was ‘overflowing.’ I joined in his laughter but my laughs quickly turned to tears as my swollen belly squeezed tighter and tighter.

Luckily my mom was just across the hallway so after she took a few unforgiving pictures, she drove us to the hospital. All the way there the only thing I could think was, there was no turning back. It hadn’t occurred to me until then that this baby had to come out and I couldn’t change my mind about it now.

My entire body was shaking uncontrollably by the time we got to the hospital. I was in fragile condition both physically and emotionally and the fact that I was 17 didn’t help one bit (I mean my frontal lobe wasn’t even fully developed yet)!

All the way to the labor and delivery ward I could feel people staring as they wheeled this pregnant teen down the hallway. I didn’t care though. Over the past 9 months I had experienced every look there was: concern, compassion, empathy, confusion, disbelief, disgust. Whispers and disapproval no longer bothered me. Yeah right, who was I kidding. Of course people’s looks bothered me, I just got really good at pretending they didn’t.

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